Here are this week’s shower thoughts.
1-5 Shower Thoughts
1. At a certain point in your life, sitting at home alone, watching TV on a Friday night goes from being super depressing to the most enjoyable part of your week.
2. Grandmothers used to share old wive’s tales. Now they share fake news on social media.
3. Depression is the most common mental illness, yet it somehow convinces everyone that they’re completely alone.
4. It’s horribly unfair that loud snorers can sleep through their own snoring.
5. Pineapple on pizza is like the country music of pizza. People either like it or they will literally threaten to murder everyone that even speaks of it.
6-10 Shower Thoughts
6. Commuters probably get stuck in traffic with roughly the same group of people every day, just in a different order.
7. Medical offices have a lot of nerve asking you to show up 15 minutes early but then not getting to you until 45 minutes after your scheduled time.
8. Allergies to pollen are just our bodies rejecting the sexual advances of a different lifeform. Perhaps it’s the people without allergies who are the sickos.
9. Flat-earthers must be afraid that meteorites could hit the earth from underneath.
10. You don’t realize how fast your parents saw you growing up until you see another child growing up.
11-15 Shower Thoughts
11. We say “marriage is forever” but divorce is definitely more forever.
12. The true mark of adulthood is when your parents no longer schedule your Dr appointments so instead, you just don’t go and hope you don’t die.
13. People drink alcohol with a paper bag wrapped around it to hide the fact that its alcohol. But nothing looks more like alcohol than a drink in a paper bag.
14. If people only laughed in conversations when they truly found something humorous, conversations would be very awkward and tense.
15. Your accent is your mouth’s font.