16-20 Shower Thoughts
16. Checking your phone repeatedly when you have no friends is like opening the fridge expecting new food.
17. “King of the Hill” and “Bob’s Burgers” are the few animated sitcoms where the dad is the smart one while the mom is an idiot.
18. People in movies almost never have to adjust the driver’s seat in a newly purchased or stolen vehicle.
19. People ask what you do for a living so they can calculate the level of respect they will give you.
20. A parking ticket is a speeding ticket for going 0 mph where it isn’t allowed.
21-25 Shower Thoughts
21. People have humiliated YOU in THEIR fake arguments.
22. Taking a dog named Shark to the beach is a very bad idea.
23. It’s always “big spoon” and “little spoon” when referring to people, but real spoons fit best when they’re the exact same size.
24. The brain has never experienced it, but it can still make an extremely realistic simulation of falling from great heights in nightmares.
25. Those “Make your passion your job and never work a day in your life” people have apparently never used their favorite song as their wake up alarm.