Here are this week’s shower thoughts, some of which were submitted by our readers.
1-5 Interesting Shower Thoughts
1. A bed is a shelf for your body when you are not using it.
2. My standard of living is far greater than that of a king in medieval times. In our modern world we can eat food from almost anywhere we please, we have modern healthcare that can cure diseases that would have been fatal in medieval times, we can travel to other lands quickly and safely. All of this would have been out of reach for even the wealthiest people in medieval times.
3. The “Try Again” button has never fixed any error I’ve had on a computer.
4. Netflix needs an incognito mode so that I can watch terrible films without getting recommended more terrible films
5. I’m raising my son on Netflix, and so far he has not been exposed to one iota of advertising, and has no idea what the ‘cool’ toys are.
6-10 Interesting Shower Thoughts
6. At some point in evolution, man evolved into needing toilet paper.
7. Why didn’t the eagles just fly Frodo with the ring into Mordor? It would have saved a lot of mental anguish and an appendage.
8. A large amount of money and time is spent by both sexes trying to make their chest look bigger.
9. Everything you are and think is nothing more than electrical receptors firing.
10. At some point, everyone on Earth has been the youngest person alive.
11-15 Interesting Shower Thoughts
11. In Japan, radiation creates monsters (Godzilla) and in America radiation creates superheroes.
12. The human body is really quiet for everything it does.
13. The average student learns calculus at a slightly younger age than when Isaac Newton discovered it.
14. Anyone notice the irony behind “hyphenated” and “non-hyphenated”?
15. I just got a book (made of tree) and put it in gift wrap (made of tree). Then I wrote a card in pencil (made of more trees) to put it in an envelope (another tree) and put it all under a goddamned TREE.
16-20 Interesting Shower Thoughts
16. At a 27.44mph top speed, it is illegal for Usain Bolt to run in a school zone
17. In FBI shows, cops are incompetent unskilled simpletons who just get in the way. In Cop shows, the FBI are bureaucratic incompetent simpletons who just get in the way.
18. One of the perks of being a woman is that no one can ever surprise you with a kid years later and tell you you’re the mom.
19. If you would mount garbage trucks with cameras you could weekly update Google maps street view.
20. Saying “I’ve lost the stylus for my tablet” would have also made sense 2000 years ago
21-25 Interesting Shower Thoughts
21. Saving Private Ryan, Interstellar, and now The Martian are all about saving Matt Damon
22. In the movie Terminator 2, the Terminator and the T-1000 talking on the phone were two AI machines trying to convince each other that they were human.
23. In Stuart Little, the Little family walked into an orphanage, looked at ever child there, and decided on a rodent.
24. The most tragic victims of irony are the trees cut down to make copies of The Lorax.
25. What if your dog one day just randomly said “Nobody is going to believe you” and never spoke again.