Here are this week’s shower thoughts.
1-5 Shower Thoughts
1. It’s always easy to fall asleep on a couch unless you’re actually trying to fall asleep on a couch.
2. It must be annoying for nudists when they have to clean their glasses.
3. Maybe dogs hate the mailman because they are the one person to come to the house almost every day but is never allowed by the owners to come inside. Something’s got to be wrong with this guy, from the dog’s perspective.
4. I’m lucky to be broke at a time when minimalism and sustainability are in style.
5. “So who’s driving?” is going to be the dad joke of the decade when self-driving cars are more of a thing.
6-10 Shower Thoughts
6. I’m at that point in life that I don’t want to be around anyone I have to use “Urban Dictionary” to understand.
7. Having weekdays off is like playing an MMO when no one else is online.
8. I’m self-conscious of how fast my windscreen wipers are whenever it’s raining lightly.
9. As a father, on Mother’s Day, I feel the overwhelming need to shelter my wife from being a mother for a day. On Father’s Day, however, I feel the overwhelming need to be a good dad and spend time with my kids.
10. A lot of people think PaulMcCartney was replaced by a look-alike yet Michael Jackson literally turned white and no one questions his identity.
11-15 Shower Thoughts
11. If I was a vampire, I would work retail so I know who deserves to die.
12. Everyone should occasionally have to get in a simulator where all the other drivers drive like them.
13. I wonder what it feels like for a video game NPC to give some random nobody 3 gold pieces to cut their grass and then find out like a month later that the guy went on to defeat the great evil that plagued the land.
14. The older I get, the more I realize it’s not that my dad didn’t know he was being embarrassed, it’s that he didn’t care.
15. The easiest way to make me hate a software is to have a “remind me later” button but not a “no thanks”.