Here are 5 things you should know.
1. The easiest way to make sure your kid fights you on every chore is to avoid saying “thank you.”
An experience shared by a teacher ” I’m a teacher. Every year, I get at least one parent who tells me that they just expect their kids to do their chores, and they won’t ever say “thank you” for doing them. Then these parents wonder why their kids fight them on chores.
These same parents often tell me they don’t understand why their kids put so much effort into my class.
It’s really very easy. I thank them for their answers in class. I thank them for helping their classmates. I thank them for picking up after a lab. I thank them when they give their presentations.
Every opportunity I have to do it, I say “thank you.”
My mom always gave me an enthusiastic “thank you!” when my sister and I did chores. As a result, we always did them, often without being asked. We said “thank you” when she made dinner.
A home culture of saying “thank you” is a very easy and effective way to improve adult/teen relationships, and you’ll have happier teens too.”
2. Especially in times as chaotic and uncertain as these – a little patience and humanity towards customer service agents go a long, LONG way. The less you shout at them, the more inclined they will be to help you.
3. If you are ever training someone on something new, you should teach them how to fix a mistake at every step of the process.
4. There is NEVER only one deer.
Never, ever ever.
If you’re driving at night and just saw a single deer cross the road at the edge of your headlights? SLOW DOWN ANYWAY. Slow to a crawl, if it’s safe to do so. A second deer is nearby and will follow it across, every time.
5. You should support “kill” shelters. They are usually state-owned and are required to take in every animal that they are given.
They simply just don’t have enough resources/funding to care for all the animals that they get. By supporting them, i.e. adopting from them, you are directing helping them not to have to put down any animals. Boycotting “kill” shelters just furthers the problem.
“No Kill” shelters are usually privately owned and can take in the animals they want. Because of this, they don’t exceed their capacity or the amount of animal they are capable of caring for, so they don’t need to put down any animal.
Here’s a good video from Kitten Lady that goes more in-depth into this.
Number One is pure psychobabble. Telling kids Thank You after they are doing what’s expected of them may be fine in a rare circumstance, but most often it is damaging. The child needs to learn respect of authority. You might say that telling a child thank you for obeying you is giving them a reason to respect you. It’s just the opposite. By telling a child thank you each time they do something required, you are shifting the authority away from you to them. Suddenly THEY are doing YOU a favor, by obeying you. If this is such a wonderful concept, then why doesn’t the military use it? “Private! Take ten laps!” “Yes, sir!” “Thank, you Private.”
Children can be encouraged in other ways. They do not have to be rewarded with a thank you for doing what’s expected and required. This does not teach them responsibility. If you thank them for feeding their pet cat, then they are learning that if they don’t feel like feeding their pet cat, all they’re forfeiting is a “thank you.”
Jim is absolutely right